We will start this day 6 (Sunday) Of course first thing ticked off the list is a lay in. A nice 12 hour sleep again. I feel so much better for that long solid sleep. It was my sister’s birthday so I went to my parents for tea and cake, and lunch. I had things I needed to do with my mum which had been agreed to do once my other sister and the children left. But my 4 year old nephew believes he’s one of Santa’s real elves and had Christmas youtube videos blaring out. So we didn’t get to do what we needed to do. It didn’t matter and I did the grown up thing as I had stuff to do like edit and housework so I came home. It was actually really nice to have a chilled evening editing, 3 pretty easy to edit videos and write a few blog posts. I get asked the same 6 questions a day from my *365 Days Of Self-Care A Journal and one of them being grateful. That Sunday I was so grateful for my own home. A place where no baby shark, but Christmas version was playing and I could concentrate on what I wanted to do. I do love my niece and nephew but I really don’t want to have Rudolph The Red Nose Reindeer playing in January lol. I did really need to have that time with my mum but I knew I could do it another weekend so for me peace and quiet was the thing I needed the most. I also needed to get things done so I made that my priority. I had done my weekly food shop on my way to my parents as well and picked healthy choices which really does help to love yourself more.
On Monday I woke to my alarm 6:55am and went to work. I must be grinding my teeth in my sleep and have chipped the tiniest piece off one of my front bottom teeth. I hate the dentist like most people but agreed to book and appointment and go. It will only need to be filed down to get rid of the sharpness. Another question I get asked daily which to me is a hard one but was easy on Monday. That is A moment of bravery. Well booking a dentist appointment is both self care and brave. To me bravery is going to get an injection or walking down to the operating theatre on my own with the nurse. Its really something you have to think about. What was a moment of bravery for you today?
I was also super happy my workload was busy. I love a busy day at work because it is productive and goes fast. Before I knew it it was lunch then home time. To be fair the whole week has gone fast. Being busy really helps me. It makes me not have time to think about things I shouldn’t be thinking of anyway but am. I also loved the fact I was able and wanting to help others and share my knowledge.
The week really has been an average week, one where I went to work daily, I chatted with friends and come home each night for a healthy dinner and chill out in the warm.
I mentioned this before but I am naturally cold and feel the cold way before anyone else. Well I woke up I think it was Wednesday night and I was freezing cold. I already slept with 2 blankets, a duvet, a long sleeve t-shirt, fussy socks and a sweatshirt material kind of onesie. Well I decided for a better nights sleep I would wear 2 onesies a normal sweatshirt kind then under it I wear a cotton one. Now I am not cold and its so nice. I am also wearing a vest most days because I get cold at work. Heat is so important to me that I really have to keep warm especially if I am in a flare up. Touch wood I haven’t had one for a while but you never know when they will appear.
A nice long hot bubble bath was also the best thing for me this week. I am really struggling with the condition of my hair at the minute and it feels dirty as soon as I wash it. So I brought some new shampoo today to try. We will see how it goes but it could also be a side effect from my medication. I was also grateful for dry shampoo to save me when I was enjoying my bed too much then had to rush to work. Lets hope this shampoo will work.
I have really tried to keep positive and I am setting myself reminders so I remember to. It is really hard when you don’t feel well. I am not sure what fully is making me feel unwell otherwise I would tell you but when I look at my home screen now its says stay positive and I open the phone, my best friend’s baby Aurelia is smiling away at me. Things that make you happy and smile really do cheer you up and keep you motivated.
The book this week has talked about the overwhelming feeling and I can definitely say yes that happened lol. But that is ok too. Everyone has good days and bad days and at times things do get a little too much. I really felt like crying on Thursday night and its really ok to cry, self care isn’t all about baths and meditation, its about the struggles and the strength you grow to love and do things for yourself. And I guess this is why it means so much to me. I have learnt so much from myself and self care but I have so much more to learn. Everyone has the days when you struggle to get out of bed. We go to work in the dark and arrive home in the dark isn’t obvious we would.
Instead of crying I said to myself ” come on Mel you can do this, find something to do and you will be ok” so I read. I am not a good reader but if I stick to this goal for the year I will have read 52 books. Thats more than I have in my whole entire life. I have read 2 books already. 1 a week and just brought 3 more to keep me going.
If there is something I want to watch at 9pm then I will stop at 8pm and read. If not I stop at 9pm and fill in my self care journal and my daily planner bullet journal. Then I read for about 40 minutes then take my medication (yuck) brush my teeth and shut my eyes by 10pm.
My daily planner asks you to set objectives or projects per day. This week as its only the start I really have thought of myself. I knew it was a pretty quiet week, the cold and flu lurgy is going round which I really don’t want to get, my bed is my soft furnishing office for the evening or my chill out zone. Its also the warmest room in my flat. I need to invest in another heater.
Every night I write my feelings down in a mind map really. In the words of my jumper above ” Je suis heureux” I believe thats in the wrong tense but don’t blame me, blame Topshop. I am happy. As the week went on I saw my thoughts and feelings were more bright and cheery.
Friday morning 5am I woke up in agony, I really didn’t know what to do. I ended up walking around, squatting, cuddling my tummy but nothing happened. I went back to bed in pain and just laid with my eyes close till 6:50am I was still in agony so got up. Well my god I was ill. But never the less I had the best day ever. I was happy, I was laughing and I was so pleased and looking forward to the weekend. After being up 40 minutes I felt better just took me double the time to get ready for work. I had to wash the top of my hair and everything. But I got there and I had the best day. I felt amazing, something I haven’t done for over a year and hello I feel normal and happy and WOW!
If self care can change me this much in 12 days what can it do in a year?
Saturday was good to. I don’t like weekends sometimes but I am thinking positive and I am liking home time as much as being out. So the mixed balance is perfect. I spent the day at my parents, well we went shopping in the morning and I brought the first of Aurelia’s first birthday presents. I love that little girl so much, she always makes me smile. I also spent £33 on books. Hello Mel have you changed that much already?! I just love that unwind, chill time and these books have been giving me some crazy dreams or something has.
I filmed 2 videos when I got home on Saturday, changed my bed and put away my clothes. I am really trying to keep the flat clean and tidy, organised and “healthy”. I mean this flat has to be full of good positivity the amount of cactus I own right?
This week I have also started to think more on meditation, how to practice it more and something maybe I will try to do daily but in more depth next week. Do you meditate? If so for how long? Knowing me I will do it for 20 minutes before bed, not remember to turn the alarm on and fall asleep. Meditation is something I am use to but I really want it to help with the positive energy I am receiving and feeling.
How did your week go? What is one thing you’d like to hear from me about self care?