It is Sunday and for some, that’s the beginning of a new week and others its the end of a week. Sunday’s are the end of the week but also a chance to prepare and motivate me for the next. Self care is hugely important and definitely now, whilst we are in a world pandemic. What you do, wear, eat, go, anything is self care. A chance for all of us to really focus on our health, both physically and mentally. We are living in one of the hardest times in our life and every day can be seen differently. How we approach the week and what we do, can all be mentally challenging. Everyone of us are also living in fear of the dreaded corona virus. 

Though self care came into my life from the lengthly process of being diagnosed with Endometriosis. It is something I practice daily and something that everyone can use daily, for the chance of working out the best way to live for you and your family. Self care isn’t all about the good things such as social and creativity. It is also about getting up and out of bed, crying because it’s struggle. Anything and everything that you and your body needs and loves. 

Self care is really out there in the world right now and so much of the good things are shared. Naturally most are born and live a better life off of all the positivity around. But you know what if you just can’t make that banana bread, or make art with chalk on the pavement then that is totally ok too. Though I share a lot of my positives and have managed to bake weekly etc. There are actual times that I struggle. Most week’s actually even if it’s just an evening or afternoon, it is a struggle. 

To be honest, days turn into a week and right now though I know its Saturday as I type this out. I’m not sure what I did on what day and everything is a jumble. So this week’s update may just be a jumble. Not pinpointing days, just what I can remember. Most days are me walking from room to room in my flat so it could easily be any day. The only exception is I am on my MacBook typing this and my work computer is switched off in the living room. 

Motivation is something I have really lacked this week. Even now this is taking twice as long to write. I just look at something and think yeh maybe later. It’s an effort to even concentrate for 5 minutes sometimes. If the tv is on, I seem to naturally work better and if I really push myself I can go at least two hours without noticing the clock. But its rare that the fridge or the chocolate doesn’t call my name and distract me for a little while. There are also things you should do but it doesn’t matter how much you try, it just won’t happen. Either or anyway just try your best. Focus on what you want to do and still do as much of the things you have to do as well. Call it work, home balance. 

Some of you will know that I lost touch with my bullet journal for a while. Actually about 2 months. Every month, even week I tried but it was just not in my interest anymore. This week I have really been on this is the new “new” and that somehow I need to keep the fridge closed, motivate and do the things I need but also love to do and keep going. So I have turned back to my journal. A page a day, sort of like a daily planner and simply recording what I get out of each day. How much effort I am putting in. The must dos are written down, so it forces me to go out on a walk (exercise), be creative and whatever else I have to do, that day. Then I look at what I am eating daily. Not because I am needing to really watch what I eat but because of the amount I am grazing and my diet should be good in order for my body to feel it. As in I don’t want to eat chocolate instead of raspberries too often! 

One thing I have loved this week is my hair. As weird as this sounds or reads, I can never be bothered with my hair. I have the same amount as a lions mane. Believe it or not and it takes forever to dry. If you didn’t know I dyed my hair myself a week ago and now I want to show it off on Microsoft teams and FaceTime. When I dyed it I used a caramel toner but it left my hair a little to ginger for my liking so I re-toned it later this week with ice. 

I put a purple shampoo on it on Monday night and it told you to leave it on for 10 minutes before washing off. Not being a huge shower fan. Baths are for me, I applied it whilst in the shower, then just sat down in the bath with the shower going on my feet. Thinking about the world, life and what is going on, how I feel and general stuff really. Weird as this is, I actually enjoyed that time on my own reflecting on everything. It really helped. When I washed it off I dried it and straightened it straightaway. My hair takes forever to dry and normally I tend to just straighten it in the morning. Now if I don’t wash my hair too late I will 100% be drying it fully and straightening it because it feels so much better and makes you feel better to. 

When it comes to the point you are extremely bored, not motivated and don’t want to go out for a walk. Draw something. Anything. I have been trying to be creative once a day at least. Whether that is drawing, colouring in or even baking. Writing, filming whatever it may be. It really helps me anyway! Friday night I sat and drew for the whole evening practically. I was really into it and wanting to do it, nothing was stopping me. In full flow and loving life. See what I mean creativity really makes you feel good. 

Saturday morning I woke up at 9:30 am and for the life of me, at 11am I was still in bed and had zero motivation to even move. So I rang my mum to give me motivation. My mum always tells me to exercise, whenever I ask. Even though she knows exercise and I are not a good thing and I actually hate exercise. There has to be something wrong with me, to want to exercise! I guess you can say she really didn’t motivate me but I managed to get up and was filming by 11:30am. Something must of worked. Though the day has been pretty lazy, I got fully dressed and now its nearly 5pm and the boost button is on heating the water for my bubble bath. Making that smile appear on my face. 

This is a little jumpy I know, but I even had to go back in my phone to the photo to check when I got this. On Monday I received a parcel of sweets, chocolate, a bath bomb and a bottle of fizz from work. I don’t know why other than it thanked me for all my work I am doing during this hard time. Not everyone got this so its an achievement in its own. But how nice and thoughtful of them to send me it. Think of me and how much work I am doing etc. Though I have to admit that 5 days later the sweets have gone and the bath bomb too. Give the wine to my dad. 

And that is really my week. Creative and the least motivated week so far. That is ok though and actually being about to distract myself in creativity is helping. Next week I really need to eat better. Healthy and no more sweets. As in 3 packs in one sitting. Want to have some chilled meditation time more because that really helped actually. Possibly more doodling to. What are you plans?