When you think of addiction, well me anyway, I think of alcohol and/or drugs. But really addiction is easy to be related to anything. I am in month 2 of fighting my fashion addiction now and it’s really hard. I think I am probably making it hard on myself because of booking things and wanting new outfits.

Fashion is my go to, my love and my life. I am massively into fashion and have been for well roughly 15 years. The thing is my style and my money just clash. I am a high street kind of girl, but I tend to buy more high end high street fashion than the lower end. That is just personal taste because there is nothing wrong with low end brands, I just go for and prefer the more expensive kinds.

My go to shops are Topshop, Warehouse, Vans and Tommy Hilfiger with a splash of joules, fat face and local boutiques. So, you can see the higher prices just in the names, but I am really having to restrict myself from spending.

My first month I was in a panic that my money was nothing and so my spend was low, in fact I rewarded myself with my new layout and intro on YouTube. But £70 doesn’t go far when I want to practice floristry and go out with friends too. I just brought the one Vans t-shirt I wanted to embroider on.

My second month seems to be worse as we are transiting into summer. I need summer dresses as I only found 2 in my wardrobe suitable for summer. I have events planned that I want a new outfit for. My floristry is inspiring me, so I want to practice all the time, which of course costs money even if I get some from Tesco. The quantity you need makes a few bunches.  So even selling one bunch makes me some money I also am gifting to a friend or two. To be fair I am loving the random acts of kindness when I turn up and gift my friends’ flowers. This will work in my favour though because I will fingers crossed get orders back from them passing the word around.

This month has felt long, and I still have a week till payday. I had my ear pierced which lead to me wanting new earrings. I have 2 coats a spring one and a winter one. Denim Jackets are really on trend right now and they go as a chuck on and go for an extra layer. I found a bargain at £15 but still was adding up when I didn’t want to spend at all.

Flowers helps my addiction because the money is spent on them rather than clothes but its still a spend. Where I am starting out, I have to buy rolls of cellophane and vases. But it’s about setting me up for the future. Also, creativity really does make me happy.

It also maybe doesn’t help me because I was given some money when my Grandad passed away and though I have spent some, I want to save the rest or use for better causes like a holiday or an iPad, towards a new car. Something like that, not clothes that are going to go out of trend and last me a season or two.

I also got some money from where a membership was set up wrong and that really, I want to save. But I allowed myself to spend a third only. I spent the third on my outfit I needed. But again, it’s hard not to spend that, knowing it’s in my account.

That’s what this is about. I need to fight the addiction, I need to walk round a shop or browse online and not purchase anything. I need to budget my money out and make a weekly budget then I know that if I don’t spend it I can save or reward myself at the end of the month.  If I sell anything then the profit I need to save or put back in to the pot to buy again when I get the next order. If I decide to continue gifting flowers maybe I need to limit this to one a month, but I need to work on quantities required so I don’t over buy.

I created a bucket list for summer last weekend and maybe that wasn’t the best idea. One because I now have 20 things I want to achieve and the majority cost money, two I am more than likely going to want some new outfits or shoes to wear.

I booked a holiday which is amazing, and I can’t wait to go. Its going to help me by giving me something to look forward too, but I know I don’t have many holiday clothes, I have changed in shape as well, so we will have to purchase or create some clothes.

What I find embarrassing is that I booked the holiday, ok I had a voucher for all of it apart from the parking, but I have to ask my mum to transfer money for me to pay people. Just texting my friend ‘I will get my mum to pay you’ and I have had to say that again today as I type this because we are booking something else today. It’s just embarrassing and makes me feel bad.

When I feel, like I do today, when I am a week away from payday and I feel bad that I spent money too fast. You know this is something I need to break. It seems that I haven’t just spent on fashion this month, but the flowers as well. I want to go buy something this weekend because one its from a local boutique, so stock comes in and goes out fast and two because I just booked a holiday I am mega excited for. But I also am scared to go. I am scared because I know that I really did overspend at the beginning of the month and because I feel naughty and like I should be cross with myself for not working better and sort of breaking in only my second month. I even tried to get my mum to play a challenge with me, you know the one on YouTube where you draw or write what you want, and the other person buys it. She was reluctant to pay.

I also feel I am addicted to ear piercings now as well. I have had 2 in the space of 6 weeks. I also purchased some new earrings this month to go with or to go in my new piercings. I include this in my fashion addiction because I would say piercings especially ear ones are really on trend at the minute. I want 2 more at least already. But I feel I need to leave it a few months and see. We will see it may turn out I get it done after payday but that’s how I feel right now.

In July, I want to work better on a no spend month. It will be hard, but I don’t want to feel like it does now. Full of regret and upset with myself for buying clothes and shoes that I can live without. I have a super busy July, so I think that will help me and they are things where I don’t have to spend or even have money because its parties and places where nothing is on sale. 3 out of 4 weekends in July are like that and that makes me super happy and excited that I will have a better chance at breaking the addiction. More so than this month anyway. I finish floristry school for summer as well, so I think I will still put that money away or use the money on flowers to practice. The money I can save means I can save it or go through my holiday clothes and buy some that I really need.

Are you addicted to fashion? Or something else? It’s really easy to get addicted to something. I really want to break my addiction and I really think being busy in July is going to help me. I need to concentrate on the things I am excited for and that way I can purely buy and/or save for them. You always need new clothes for a holiday.